Sometimes God Hides

 

‘Do I look on blindly and say I see the way?’

 

From ‘Close to the Edge’ by Yes (from the Album ‘Close to the Edge’)

 

 

As is well known to my friends, I am a great admirer or the rock band King Crimson and their guitarist (and only original and constant member) Robert Fripp. One of Fripp’s solo pieces is entitled ‘Sometimes God Hides’. When I first came across it, I was a bit unsure of the title. From my perspective as a Christian, I was thinking that surely God is in the business of revealing himself and not hiding himself.

 

But then, consider these words from Isaiah 45 vs 15; ‘Truly you are a God who hides himself’.

 

Hmm…

 

Sometimes when we are most desperate to see God, feel God, welcome God’s ‘intervention’, have God answer our prayers, God can indeed seem very hidden indeed. Distant, or even absent, and often silent.

 

Distant.

 

Absent.

 

Silent.

 

I have said before in sermons that there are so many incidents in Scripture in general and in the Gospels in particular where God is absent. This warrants further study! But that must wait for the moment.

 

Is God hiding?

 

Part of the reflections appropriate to this season of Advent involve us asking about our waiting for God to fulfil his promises, our longing for the light to fully come and dispel the darkness, our hope that our prayers might at last be answered, and so on.

 

Is this God hiding?

 

If so, why? What does it mean for us?

 

Or do we just not see him?

 

I have some thoughts and some ideas about that, but a blog post is probably not the place to get into all of this.

 

However, I suspect that many people of faith will have known times when at the very least it seemed that God was hiding.

 

And it occurs to me that even as God revealed himself in the birth of Jesus, it was extremely low key and somewhat incognito. Bethlehem? A stable (or perhaps a ‘spare room’)? A manger?

 

A hidden revelation?

 

And then the flight of the refugee family to Egypt… into ‘hiding’.

 

So, all worthy of some thought and some reflection, I reckon.

 

The hiding God.

 

And, when, at the Wedding at Cana of Galilee, Jesus told his mother ‘my time has not yet come’, does that perhaps give us another wee clue into this whole mystery of the God who sometimes hides?

The Music of Life

 

‘Life’s a long song,

But the tune ends too soon for us all’

 

From ‘Life’s a Long Song’ (1972) by Jethro Tull

 

In the popular view of Advent as a time for candles, calendars and chocolates, for present buying, parties and preparation, and so on, reflecting on life and death and one’s own mortality may seem rather strange. But I don’t think so.

 

As we look and long for the coming of God’s Kingdom, we are inevitably faced with the reality that  (however we understand this) we will one day each have to encounter the one who is justice and judge, life and love. And for each of us that day is inevitably getting closer.

 

‘How morbid’ some might protest!

 

But I do not find it morbid at all. I have no wish to hurry towards that day. I am enjoying life, relishing being a grandparent, and still have lots and lots of plans, and I hope to have lots and lots of years in which to enjoy fulfilling these plans.

 

However, the inevitable conclusion of this life does not fill me with dread or fear, and I can see no point in ignoring or denying that which is inevitable! I do not dwell upon it, and the thoughts do not constantly haunt me. But I do sometimes ponder it all, and recall my own mortality, and acknowledge that there are now many fewer years ahead than lie behind. I think about the life I have lived, and speak openly about what lies ahead.

 

I know that for many people all of this would be unthinkable; something to be avoided at all costs. I am not one of these. It seems to me to be perfectly natural and reasonable, and as someone of faith, while I relish life and look forward to the years ahead, I do not fear death.

 

Lately, I have been reflecting a bit more on all of this and looking back over my life thus far. It would be tempting to quote Frank Sinatra and tell you that ‘Regrets, I have a few, but then again too few to mention’. But, in truth, I have more regrets than just a few! (And, anyway, I do not really like that song very much.)

 

But, while I acknowledge my past mistakes and mis-steps, it is not my regrets on which I focus as I look back over the years, but the blessings, the experiences, the people, the places, the achievements, and so on.

 

Some of my recent reflection has been occasioned by my awareness of the illness or the passing of near contemporaries, some of them public figures, but also some of them friends and acquaintances and family members.

 

And so, I have been pondering.

 

And as part of that I have began to think of songs and pieces of music that seemed to me to resonate with my reflections. These are not necessarily my favourite pieces of music (indeed, my very favourite pieces of music and songs do not appear on the list). Rather, this is music that has moved me or which speaks to me of my life and some of its various moments and experiences. Most of the chosen music is reflective or poignant, or speaks of looking back on life, or even of death and hope. All of these pieces are very meaningful to me for all kinds of different reasons, and not a few move me to tears on every hearing.

 

The compilation of this playlist remains work in progress and, I must say, I am finding it utterly engrossing and revealing. As I have said, these are not all my favourite songs or pieces of music. Indeed, some of the choices may surprise those who know me and my musical tastes. And some of these pieces may seem rather obscure.

 

The making of this playlist is a wee project I embarked upon for my own benefit, but if anyone is interested this is the link to the playlist (which remains work in progress)

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7bNZWCybpNuCWIjiLKRfn0?si=5dd86def43674882

 

Life’s a long song!

Waiting for the Light to Come

 

‘Soon, oh soon the light,
Pass within and soothe this endless night,
And wait here for you,
Our reason to be here’

 

From ‘The Gates of Delirium’ from the 1974 album ’Relayer’’ by Yes

 

Waiting and longing are a big part of this season of Advent.

 

Most of us will remember what it was like as a child to journey through the seemingly long days of December, waiting for Christmas and longing for the dawning of that day. Nowadays, it seems to me that December rushes past and Christmas is upon us before we have properly prepared!

 

But there is a still more significant Day for which we now long and wait. In Advent we are reminded that the long night will ultimately pass, and the light of God will dispel all darkness. We await the Day of Redemption.

 

Still we long and we wait….

 

…for justice to come and exploitation to end…

 

..for peace to come and war to end…

 

…for healing to come and illness to end…

 

…for comfort to come and sorrow to end…

 

…for life to come and death to end…

 

And so on.

 

Waiting and longing and hoping and praying.

 

Oh that this Day would come, and come quickly!

 

But, to turn to a more immediate matter; for many years now I have reflected on the plight of the church in Scotland and in the West in general. I know that the Christian faith is advancing in so many parts of the world and that while the tide seems to be ebbing in the West, it is in flood elsewhere. On the one hand, recent census statistics indicate that Christianity is a minority in the UK (although there are other perspectives on this) [1]. On the other hand, most analyses show that the church is growing globally, and in some cases very significantly and rapidly (especially in Africa, Asia and Latin America).[2]

 

But I still find myself wondering and (truth be told) worrying about the apparently relentless decline of the church in our land and culture.

 

When will the light of ‘revival’ come? When will the darkness of decline end.

 

(As an aside, the Church of Scotland’s relentless decline began in 1956 – the year in which I was born. Coincidence? I hope so!)

 

I mentioned revival, and I do not necessarily or simply mean that in the limited sense of the ‘awakenings’ and spiritual phenomena that have been historically recorded and described as ‘revivals’ (although not to exclude them either). I mean the more general turning of the tide of faith. And I certainly do not mean a return to ‘Christendom’ or the re-establishment (so to speak!) of the church’s historical role in society.

 

But for all of my Christian journey, people have affirmed that revival is coming, that they’ve had a vision, or a ‘word from the Lord’, to say that the tide is about to turn… in some cases they have insisted that this coming revival is but a season of prayer, fasting, and repentance away, and yet all the while the decline has continued and the drifting of our Western society from faith has not abated.

 

Am I despondent? Not really; just wondering.

 

Have I lost hope? No, I still have faith in the promises and plans of God.

 

But I am wondering and pondering just what God may be saying to us, and how we are to respond.

 

Of course, we need to be serious in asking ourselves what we might do better or how we might reflect on what church should look like and act like in our context. But I am getting very impatient with those who suggest that if only we did what we used to do then it would all be ok, or those who insist that folks today (usually, they mean ‘Ministers today’) are just not as (delete as appropriate) committed / prayerful / faithful / good at visiting / committed to the parish / biblical / etc etc. It is all so much nonsense in my view. It is simply shifting the blame and seeking an easy scapegoat.

 

But, then, neither am I much persuaded by those who think that if only we did everything in a new way, sang more modern praise, embraced technology, tried new worship forms, became more ‘contemporary’ or ‘trendy’, then all would be fine. (and, to be clear, I do think our ways of being and doing church need to be contextualised and always under review reformata et semper reformanda and all that!). But… but… but… while this may in some ways and to some extent be appropriate and right, it is not a magic answer.

 

And I am certainly not at all denying that we are still called to prayer, fasting, and repentance.

 

But we also need to consider what it means to wait, to long, to wrestle with the issues, to journey through the darkness, to continue on this road for as long as it takes before we turn the corner and see the light coming (and, I suspect that may well be beyond the lifetime of many of us).

 

I was reading Psalm 44 the other day. It is a psalm of lament and also a cry for help. The people recall that they have been told of how God did great things in times past, but now it is no longer like that. (Sound familiar?). Indeed, they have become a ‘laughing stock’ (vs 14). And, the psalmist is clear, it is not because God’s people have done anything wrong or abandoned God! (vs 17-18 & 20-21). So repentance is not going to be a quick fix for this problem.

 

Yes, they cry out to God (‘Rise up!... Rouse yourself!’ vs 23-26). But perhaps there will still be more waiting and longing…

 

Waiting and longing.

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[1] This article by Giles Fraser is well worth a read:

https://unherd.com/2022/12/secularisation-is-leading-britain-astray/?tl_inbound=1&tl_groups[0]=18743&tl_period_type=3&mc_cid=53effa1da8&mc_eid=a130ff9606

[2] See this for a balanced and thoughtful overview https://lausanne.org/content/lga/2021-03/is-christianity-shrinking-or-shifting

 

 ‘I have no thought of time,

for who knows where the time goes?

..I have no fear of time,

for who knows where the time goes?’

From ‘Who knows where the time goes? From the 1969 album ’Unhalfbricking’ by Fairport Convention 

This Season of Advent is intended to be a time to prepare. Of course, there are all the preparations that most people are undertaking over these weeks; preparations for presents and parties and dinners and get-togethers and cards and so on. 

But the intention of this Advent time is that we who look forward to the celebration of our Lord’s birth (and, indeed, to his coming again) prepare ourselves in spirit. While in more recent times, the emphasis of this season has shifted towards ‘hope’ (and I am pleased it has) the danger is that the other aspects of Advent get lost; prayer, fasting, self-examination etc. 

In past years in my blog posts, I have made much of the importance of this time of spiritual discipline, reflection and prayer for me. 

Except…

…it is far from easy!

‘Great is the darkness that covers the earth…’ but it is not easy to spend time reflecting on this in anticipation of the coming of the light, when already the Christmas lights have been twinkling for weeks.

It is not easy to consider any type of ‘fasting’ when parties and dinners begin so early.

It is not easy to enter into the pain, tension, and struggle of affirming God’s promises while these remain not yet finally or fully fulfilled, and join in the deep longing for the coming of God’s Kingdom, when we are already singing Christmas Carols.

It is not easy to spend time in prayer and self-examination when the many other preparations squeeze that time, and everything seems to get ever more hurried the nearer we get to Christmas. 

Ah time… there it is. We seem to have no time. Where does it go? Why does it seem to run away from us?

I was reflecting on some of this the other day in my prayers, or perhaps ‘despairing’ would be a better description! But the note I made in my journal ended on a more positive note… that it is worth maintaining the struggle to find the time.

For, of course, there is just as much time in each day and week of Advent as there is at any other time of the year. It is a question of how we use it, what we prioritise, and on what we focus.

And that whole theme of time is, in itself, a good thing on which to reflect in this Advent Season.

Thanksgiving

 

‘Now be thankful for good things below
Now be thankful to your maker
For the rose, the red rose blooms for all to know’

From ‘Now be Thankful’ by Fairport Convention (a 1970 single release)

 

 

Advent began early this year. 27^th November is the very earliest Sunday on which it can occur. This can be confusing for those who are used to Advent Calendars and Candles marking the passing days, as most of these start on the 1^st December. And that confusion is all the more on those years when Advent Sunday is on Sunday 3^rd December (the latest date it can be).

 

It is just the way the calendar falls.

 

Our American friends had the same issue with ‘Thanksgiving’ which is celebrated on the last Thursday of November, and so – this year – was as early as it could be; Thursday 24^th November.

 

And given that any or all of these dates (Thanksgiving, Advent Sunday, 1^st December) in many people’s minds, mark the beginning of the Christmas preparation season, we tend to have a choice (or not, given that commercially these preparations begin in October!).

 

However, all these musings are really a bit of an aside. It is Thanksgiving which is on my mind today. Not the particular celebration of this in the United States, but the whole matter of giving thanks.

 

As I begin to look forward to Christmas I often find myself reflecting on the good things in my life, perhaps all the more so since becoming a grandparent.

 

And yet, the other day when I was out walking the dogs (for whom I am also thankful!) I found myself feeling a little irritated and disgruntled. I cannot now recall what it was that had got to me, but I was unsettled and a wee bit unhappy. As I pondered why, I found myself asking why I am not more consciously thankful for life’s blessings and why I did not more often specifically thank God for these blessings.

 

I further reasoned that my lack of thankfulness might well be one reason why I got irritated and impatient!

 

It was on that very same day that I read Psalm 50 where the Psalmist says ‘Offer to God a Sacrifice of thanksgiving’ (vs 14) and then quotes God ‘those who bring thanksgiving as their sacrifice honour me’ (vs 23).

 

And so, in the light of all of this, I have decided to try and be more committed to giving thanks, and doing so specifically and regularly. And even if I am feeling irritated, impatient, or grumpy, to still give thanks.

 

As Paul said ‘Give thanks in all circumstances’ (1 Thessalonians 5: 18)

Seasons will pass you by

 

 

‘Seasons will pass you by
I get up, I get down

From ‘Close to the Edge’ by Yes (from the Album ‘Close to the Edge’)

 

 

There is little about my blogging that will surprise anyone who reads these posts.

 

•        I blog only very occasionally and haphazardly
•        Notwithstanding  that, I do tend to blog regularly in Advent
•      I love this season of Advent and wish that the church was better at allowing Advent to be Advent and not simply an excuse to prematurely celebrate Christmas
•       I use a lot of quotes from music (especially but not exclusively, rock music and particularly from that genre that is known as ‘progressive rock’)
•          I reflect a lot on the different changes and challenges of life as the years pass

 

 

So, you can expect all of these and more in this Season of Advent that began on Sunday past and which gives me the opportunity, challenge, incentive to post some musings on my blog.

 

On Sunday evening, Jane and I went to Glasgow Cathedral for the ‘Advent Procession’ led by the excellent Cathedral Choir. I like the idea of this service which seeks to reflect something of the journeying that is part of this season; the journey towards Christmas, the journey of Mary and Joseph to Bethlehem and so on.

 

That, in turn, caused me to reflect a little on the journey of life (not a very original thought, I know!).

 

When I looked at what I had written in my first Advent blog post of last year, I noted that in that post I was also reflecting on the journey of life and speaking about my imminent retiral, and musing on the opening of a new chapter in my life.

 

I am actually surprised that I wrote that, for I have been saying to folks for over a year now that I do not consider retirement to be a new chapter so much as a new season in life. Each season brings something different with new opportunities and new experiences and new things to give. So it is with this new season of my life both as a grandparent and as a Minister (although not now in full-time parish ministry).

 

Those of us who are Ministers are notorious for finding it difficult to give up work once we retire! That, it seems to me, is no real surprise. While we may have retired from full-time work, we have not retired from being ordained.

 

To begin with I felt a little ‘dislocated’ in retirement; as if I was not quite sure what this new season was for. Then I got caught up into so much ‘church’ work I began to feel that I was doing retirement wrong! But things are now clarifying, and I realise that in this new season I can offer (and have been increasingly being given opportunities to give) support to others in ministry. I suppose some of it is something like mentoring, some of it is piratical support when folks in the parish are struggling in one way or another and need someone to step int to do some things, and again some of it is just being a supportive presence for those who may have been unwell or who may be wrestling with some specific problem in Ministry. It is not quite counselling, not quite coaching, not quite supervision… but it feel right and it feels fulfilling.  

 

And so it feels that this season of my life may be a very fruitful season.

 

I am hoping that this Advent Season will be fruitful too!

The Hound of Heaven?

Ian Anderson, Jethro Tull, and God

By https://music.apple.com/nz/album/the-zealot-gene/1590404272, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=69898493

My last post referenced one aging rock star, his fading voice, but excellent recent album release (Paul McCartney and his latest album ‘McCartney III’).

So, here I go again!

I have long been a fan of the band Jethro Tull (since 1968 to be precise) and of their leader, front-man, composer, and singer Ian Anderson.

Now, unlike McCartney, Anderson’s voice was never one of the greatest, sweetest, or most powerful of rock voices. And, like McCartney’s, it has not got better over the years. I last saw Jethro Tull in 2006, and while it was a great concert (and we had wonderful seats!) it was clear that live even more than in recordings, Ian Anderson’s voice was even then struggling.

But, interestingly, in the most recent album by Jethro Tull, his voice sounds quite good. Is that down to studio manipulation, or good production techniques? Or is he just composing now within his diminishing range? I don’t know.

But I would say that this album ‘The Zealot Gene’ is a great album and I have been listening to it more often than I expected since it was released a few months ago. If you are not minded to give the whole thing a listen, then I would especially recommend the track ‘Mine is the Mountain’.

What intrigues me is the theme of the album. It is not a concept album in the traditional sense. Nonetheless, each track does have biblical allusions, and it is reported that Anderson began writing each song with a passage from the Bible in mind.

Interesting.

In several interviews over the years, Ian Anderson has expressed his views on religion, Christianity, and Jesus. He is not at ease with pomp and ceremony, and expresses a distaste towards some aspects of organised religion. But he also claims not to be hostile towards faith. He is clear that he is not a Christian, while being very positive about Jesus.

He is quoted as saying  ‘I’m a big supporter of Christianity and the physicality of the church, but I don’t call myself a Christian… they all hope that I’m going to come out of the closet one day and say ”That’s it yeah I really am a Christian after all!” but I’m not going to do that.’[i]

Hmmm… I wonder.

Like so many people, he cannot quite throw it off. It is always there. It is a constant theme in his work. And – as he acknowledges in his interviews – he often performs in churches, wants to support the physical presence of churches, and fundraises for them.

As I listen to his songs and as I read the interviews, it seems to me that he can’t let it go…

…or perhaps it can’t let him go.

And, to get away from Ian Anderson specifically, I would observe that this is the case with many folks. God (as I would say) or ‘it’ (however they would determine that) will not let them go.

I think this disturbs some people.

I think it makes some folks very angry (because they really want to be rid of ‘religion’, but just cannot shrug it off.)

I think it can present some deep contradictions in some people (take the high priest of atheism, Richard Dawkins, who seems unable to leave alone the religion he would seek to abominate, calls himself a ‘cultural Christian’,  and attends carol services at Christmas. As one commentator said ‘Even he, it seems, has been infected by some version of the God meme.’[ii])

Now, I am not wanting to make this personal about the views of either Ian Anderson or Richard Dawkins both of whom I greatly admire, even if I would not always agree with them, and each of whom I would be delighted to spend an evening with, chatting, discussing, exploring and arguing over a fine malt whisky or a glass of good red wine. I am more interested in the fact that so many folks who reject faith still cannot quite get beyond faith issues. Something still niggles, upsets, intrigues, angers, or all of these, and more. They seem not to ba able to ‘let go’… or…??

As someone of faith, I cannot help but wonder if it is not so much as they cannot let it go, as God will not let them go.

C. S. Lewis (most well-known for the Narnia novels) was one of the best known apologists for Christianity in the 20^th century. Yet, he had been an atheist who only very resistantly and reluctantly acknowledged the God who had (so it seemed to him) relentlessly pursued him. And so (as he records it) he embraced Christian faith ‘kicking, struggling, resentful’. He said he was ‘the most reluctant convert in all of England’.

And I suppose for me as someone who believes, I see in all this some indication of a God who will not easily or readily let us go. He is the ‘Hound of Heaven’ of Francis Thompson’s poem (which had a huge influence on J. R. R. Tolkien).

 

I fled Him, down the nights and down the days;

I fled Him, down the arches of the years;

I fled Him, down the labyrinthine ways

Of my own mind; and in the mist of tears

I hid from Him, and under running laughter.

Up vistaed hopes I sped;

And shot, precipitated,

Adown Titanic glooms of chasmèd fears,

From those strong Feet that followed, followed after…

 

 

…‘Ah, fondest, blindest, weakest,

I am He Whom thou seekest!’

 

And, as I conclude this post, I am happily listening to Jethro Tull’s ‘The Zealot Gene’. Thank you Ian Anderson!

 

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[i] https://indeflagration.fr/in-english/ian-anderson-jethro-tull-interview/

[ii] https://www.newstatesman.com/politics/2011/12/religion-christmas-dawkins